Cheetos and Fritos and Cake...Oh My!

Three words...I BLEW IT!  No excuses.  No rationalizations.  The food was there and I ate it.  I went to Vallarta (a huge Mexican chain grocery store) at 7:00 in the morning to pick up some chips.  That is what I was signed up for on the potluck list.  My plan was to go in, get the chips, and get out.  No pit stops, no injuries to my psyche or my ego or my waistline.  Well Vallarta used to be one of my most favorite spots to have breakfast at (secretly).  I would get 3 carnitas tacos, a side of the greasiest chips in the world, and a small Dr. Pepper.  When I walked in to the store it was like seeing an old boyfriend that I still had the hots for.  The sights, the smells, the sounds...took me straight to the counter to order my breakfast.  I stood there a minute...and then a guy came up to me and said that the girl working that counter would be back in a few minutes.  I took that as a sign from God to run baby run.  So I did.  I walked away from the counter and went directly to the potato chip aisle.  I found the Fritos right away.  The Cheetos I had to take a few minutes to search for...but I eventually did find the ONE BAG they had in that whole store.  I went to the check out...there was no waiting in aisle 7... and I was set to go...and as much as I wanted to go to the right and walk out of the door...it was like my alignment was off or something because I kept veering (spell check please) to the left.  I went ahead and ordered...mmm...not quite my usual.  I ordered 2 carnitas tacos, a small Dr. Pepper with extra ice, and no chips.  When I got in my car I could hear my trainer's voice telling me to make smart choices...I could remember how I felt the last time I  stuffed myself with bad food (otherwise known as the day before yesterday) and I felt convicted...okay not really convicted but I felt kinda guilty.  Nevertheless I ate the tacos...but on a positive note I only took 2 sips of the soda and threw it out.  Wasted money but it felt kinda good in a way.  You see Dr. Pepper is my BFF and to just dump her like that was really hard, but I did it.  I got to work and saw all of the good food that people brought and I knew I was toast (another food reference!!!)  My strategy for lunch hour was to walk for 30 minutes before I ate, because I figured that by the time I came back from my walk most of the good stuff would be gone...instead I ate right away, with everyone else.  I had a hot dog and doritos with nacho cheese and chili on both.  I only drank water...which was actually pretty easy because the only sodas were sprite and diet coke...of which I am not a fan...when the birthday cake came out...can you say chocolate...I resisted.  When the chocolate chip cookies came out my knees buckeled and I caved.  I even had a scoop of vanilla ice cream to go with my cookies.  I had 2 cookies at lunch...and then another about 2:30.  For dinner I had one pork chop, one egg, and one piece of toast (yes I said dinner not breakfast) and . . . . . . I had a "tall can" of Dr. Pepper.  I'm not going to make light of all of this...because it's not a joke...and it's not okay.  This is my life I'm dealing with here and I need to start taking it more seriously.  I have decided today that I will not participate in the pot lucks at work, because I have no will power.  I was having an especially emotional day today so that didn't help me much either.  Someone hurt my feelings, which is why the chocolate chip cookies felt so right.  Old, bad habits really do die hard...but if these habits don't die then I am going to...I mean...I know we're all gonna die some day...but I don't want to help myself into my grave!  God willing I will have tomorrow to start again...I did go for a 25 minute walk today after lunch...and that was a very good thing.  I also discovered that Yoplait Whipped Yogurt in Vanilla flavor almost tastes like buttercream frosting...can I get a big "Hell Yeah!!!"