Monday, December 16, 2013

Because Your Worth It (and so am I!)

I sing on the worship team at my church.  Yesterday after the first church service someone came up to me and told me that he feels I am "annointed when it comes to singing for the Lord"...and although I do believe that was one of the highest compliments I ever recieved, I also felt extremely unworthy of it.  So I hate to admit it but I spent the next 15 minutes sitting in my car with this gentlemen,s words ringing in my mind...and I thought "annointed, I could never be annointed" but as the day went on I came to a different realization...why not?  Why couldn't I be annointed?  Why couldn't I receive and accept a gift from God and feel totally worthy of it?  The answer...because I am so used to not believing that I can that I just figure that I don't and that is a sad sad thing.  So I cleared the negative thoughts from my head.  Didn't allow myself to believe that I am not worthy.  I wasn't defeted by lack of confidence and self doubt.  I looked in the mirror and said out loud...you are totally worthy!!!! The greatest thing about that is that I believed it!  Exercising has been doing wonders for my psyche.  I feel so much more energized.  I feel like I want to do things to keep me energized.  I want to comb my hair, because yes I was to a point were I wore my gave up on life sweatpants, threw my hair in a ponytail and I was done...and now I want to put make-up on. I want to do the best I can whith what's in my closet! (Because I haven't shopped for clothes in soooo long.) But the greatest thing is I want to do more!  I can't remeber the last time I felt so motivated!  I won't pretend I am doing great...my food choices leave so much more to be desired and (as you've heard me say plenty of times) I'm working on that...but exercise has become one of my favorite things to do...and even though I refuse to get on a scale unless I absolutely have to....I kow it's making a change.  Numbers can't tell me that, but my mind, and soul, and spirit is saying it loud and clear!  I am even excited that I get to increase my lunchtime from half an hour to one whole hour for the next two weeks...because that means I have time to go to the gym across the street!  If you are trying to find motivation just to get started you are not alone...I know what thats like...but Ifinally learned to refuse any thoughts that made me believe I couldn't, or wouldn't, life is worth so much more than that...my life is worth so much more than that....and so is yours!